Blog Stupid

Watching a Quiznos™ commercial about $5 sammiches... Lady sitting there staring at a $5 bill, sniffs it, looks left, looks right, shoves the bill into her pie hole.

This on its own is not a big deal to me. Kinda funny. The lady has a bowl cut hairdo. She could quite possibly be the daughter of Mo from the Three Stooges. I laughed at it the first couple of times I saw it.

Third time's a charm. As I watch TV on auto-pilot, the commercial pops up again. This time, I notice the disclaimer in the lower-left of the screen: "Dramatization. Do not attempt." Um, what? No, this qualifies for a "WTF?!" and deserves to be filed under, "Somebody Must Have Tried It Before."

Dramatization. Do not attempt. This can be translated into the following: "Dear stupid American television viewer: The $5 dollar bill should not be eaten. If you are sitting there watching our commercial and you are struck with the overwhelming urge to imitate the goofy-looking actress we've hired who is eating a $5 bill, don't. We created this scene in our commercial as an imaginary scenario meant to be humorous and not to suggest that we think you should eat a $5 bill that you would otherwise spend at one of our fast food restaurants near you. Thank you, Mr. or Mrs. Idiot"

Every time I see one of these stupid legal tidbits on products or in commercials, I want to run out and kick the person to whom it is directed square in the squirrel snacks. Seriously, what the hell?!

It is tempting to support the idiotic notion or selective sterilization.